Glasbeniki bi se pogosto morali držati glasbe in ne trositi svoje modrosti vsakemu, ki jim želi prisluhniti. Kombinacija slave, napihnjenih egov, drog in norosti lahko sproducira res čudaške (in pogosto nadvse smešne) izjave.
Objavljamo 100 najsmešnejših izjav glasbenikov, ki so jih zbrali pri britanskem magazinu The Clash. Največ so jih zbrali The Beatles in brata Gallagher iz Oasis, na lestvici pa so tudi Bono, Johnny Rotten, Mick Jagger, Madonna in Eminem. Zaluženo se na vrhu lestvice nahaja Serge Pizzorno iz angleške skupine Kasabian. Zaradi avtentičnosti prevodov nismo objavljali.
100. "I dont mean to sound like a cheap prostitute, but you can call me what you like."
Chris Martin
99. "I believe in a long, prolonged, derangement of the senses in order to obtain the unknown."
Jim Morrison
98. "Until I was nine years old I thought cunt was a term of endearment."
Pete Doherty
97. "Everybody does drugs... When you go on the road, theres nothing to do but do drugs and fuck."
Steven Tyler, Aerosmith
96. "I dont listen to music. I hate music."
Johnny Rotten
Johnny Lydon, bolj znan kot Johnny Rotten.
95. "I hate to see chicks perform. Hate it... Because they whore themselves. Especially the ones that dont wear anything. They fuckin whore themselves."
Bob Dylan
94. "To some Im a junkie madman who should be dead, and to others, Im a mythical genius."
Keith Richards
93. "The way I compliment a girl now is by saying, ‘I want to throw knives at your vagina."
Marilyn Manson
92. "I feel bad for people who dont drink, When they wake up... thats the best theyre going to feel all day."
Frank Sinatra
91. "England isnt good on lubricants."
Caleb Followill, Kings Of Leon
90. "I dont pay any attention to the business side of music. I paid a whole lot of attention to the sex, drugs and rock ‘n roll though."
Chrissie Hynde
89. "Im on a diet. Its very strict: all hot dogs. Just sausages, constantly. Its working out - Ive gained fifteen pounds!"
Beth Ditto
Beth Ditto (The Gossip).
88. "People would say to me, "Hey man, you look just like Paul McCartney", and Id say: "I wish I had his money!""
Paul McCartney
87. "The idea of having to conform to someone elses ideal is unacceptable. Im gonna be me. And if I cant be me, then Id rather not do it."
Lenny Kravitz
86. "I enjoy looking like a tart and thinking like a politician."
P.J. Harvey
85. "I could go on stage, unzip my pants, and hang my dick out and people would think it was some statement or something."
Bono
84. "As long as you remain black, youre still gonna be a nigga."
Eazy-E
83. "The only thing that could possibly save British politics would be Margaret Thatchers assassin."
Morrissey, 1992
82. "We dont like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out."
Decca Records o razlogih zavrnitve Beatlov leta 1962.
81. "Im a bisexual man whos never had a homosexual experience."
Brett Anderson, Suede
80. "Im not homosexual, Im not heterosexual, Im just sexual."
Michael Stipe
79. "Its no longer sex, drugs and rock ‘n roll. Its crack, masturbation, and Madonna."
Scott Weiland
78. "Ultimately, I want to make everyone horny."
Patti Smith
Patti Smith rada razvnema svoje občinstvo.
77. "I like them old and rich."
Lily Allen o tem, kar jo privlači pri moških.
76. "I just dont think weve ever wrote shit tunes. Even when we were amateurish, we knew we were writing better songs than other bands."
Phil Etheridge
75."When I dance, its incredible. I cant describe it, theres no words. You just tap into your mojo and you just go."
Johnny Borrell
74. "All this role model bullshit; you dont have any extra responsibilities because you made some good songs! Your only responsibility is to make good songs."
Kanye West
73. "If you want a warning about doing drugs just look at Pete Doherty and Amy Winehouse - it couldnt be any plainer. I mean, lets face it, theyre doing nothing for your intellect, your wit or your complexion…or your hairstyle for that matter."
Peter Hook
72. "The hippie aesthetic and the way of life has always made me want to puke, but at the same time Im a complete hippie; Im just a vegetarian, peace and love, love vibe, hippie meditator - and I hate hippies! I dont know what Im gonna do. I may as well just shoot myself in the head!"
Flea (RHCP)
71."Sometimes we pee on each other before we go on stage."
Trent Reznor
70. "I dont know anything about music. In my line you dont have to."
Elvis Presley
69. "Im the one thats got to die when its time for me to die, so let me live my life the way I want to."
Jimi Hendrix
68. "Elvis died the day he went into the army."
John Lennon
John Lennon: ljubitelj rock n roll in nasprotnik vojaških uniform.
67. "The American public really does have a death wish for me. They want me to die. Im not going to die."
Courtney Love
66. "When I die, bury me on my stomach and let the world kiss my ass."
L.L. Cool J
65. "Im thought of as this pissy, complaining, freaked-out schizophrenic who wants to kill himself all the time."
Kurt Cobain
64. "Ive always enjoyed myself. Unhappy periods for me last about twenty minutes."
Keith Moon
63. "When I first went to the Betty Ford Center I was very surprised they didnt have a bar there... I thought they taught you how to drink like a gentleman."
Ozzy Osbourne
Ozzy Osbourne: simpatično zmeden.
62. "A rock ‘n roll star should have a drug habit at least once in their career, they should have a Rolls Royce, should smash the fucker up, should have a big house, should get off his head and THAT is a rock ‘n roll legacy."
Tom Meighan
61. "I think Ill got to Thailand for a year and become a Thai boxer. Im gonna train for a year."
Matt Helders (Arctic Monkeys)
60. "I thought Id give being a frontman a shot. I didnt know what the fuck I was doing - I still dont."
Dave Grohl
59. "The Beatles were just a band that made it very, very big, thats all."
John Lennon
58. "Madonna is closer to organised prostitution than anything else."
Morrissey
57. "Ive never had a problem with drugs. Ive had problems with the police."
Keith Richards
56. "If I didnt have some kind of education, then I wouldnt be able to count my money."
Missy Elliott
55. "I was thinking what the differences were when we last played here twenty-eight years ago. Well, theres the smoking ban, but fuck that. Were still bombing the shit out a country we shouldnt be and the Prime Minister is still a cunt."
Terry Hall, V Festival 2009
54. "How could you even dream or think something of someone who is as uncommercial as I am?"
Lou Reed
53. "How the fuck am I still here?"
Mani, Primal Scream & Stone Roses
52. "If Amy Winehouse thinks shes invincible, shes so far wrong its not even funny. She shits, she bleeds, she shaves, just like everybody else on the planet."
Joe Elliot
51. "Theres no guy that would wanna kill us. There are girls that get so obsessed they would want to kill us. They wanna shoot us, they wanna do whatever."
Caleb Followill, Kings of Leon
50. "There isnt a town in the world I havent run amok in."
Joe Strummer
49. "Im an instant star; just add water and stir."
David Bowie
48. "The Who is just a brand name now - two old fuckers with wrinkles and tricks."
Pete Townshend
47. "I break my back for music because its something that I love, but Im not going to break my back for a bank. I wouldnt want to be an ATM repairman; there are some things that just arent worth it."
Josh Homme
46. "As I get older my eyesights going bad, I dont know what Im in for [with groupies] until they come backstage and theyre very large with missing teeth."
Nikki Sixx
45. "I already feel that I am making a political statement by sticking around in music, when I am doing it so differently to everyone else."
M.I.A.
44. "I do sometimes think I could have done without the drugs actually; that was a waste of time, and a huge risk. But then again, theres nothing I can change, so in a way regret is pointless."
Marianne Faithfull
43. "When I get stirred it incites something inside of me. I want to bash my head on the wall… I dont know what else to do. If I could rip my fucking chest open on that stage I would."
Keith Flint
Keith Flint: mislite, da si njegov zdravnik boji, ko mu gleda grlo?
42. "Ive learnt that theres nothing in my day to day life or anything that I do that is in any way aimed at changing how Im perceived or how Im presented; its completely impossible."
Pete Doherty
41. "I use too much of my brain and need to let some of it rest."
Kanye West
40. "If I saw me Id want to speak to me, too - Id think, ‘That guy looks like hes from Mars, hes somehow strangely compelling. I dont even look human."
Johnny Borrell
39. "It gets better and better being me."
Liam Gallagher
38. "Maybe they think Im a big-mouthed cunt from Manchester, and theyd be correct. I dont give a fuck what people think about me. Im not arsed."
Liam Gallagher
37. "I suppose I do get sad, but not for too long. I just look in the mirror and go, ‘What a good-looking fuck you are."
Liam Gallagher
36. "Chris Martin looks like a geography teacher. Whats all that with writing messages about Free Trade [on his hand]? If he wants to write things down Ill give him a pen and a pad of paper. Bunch of students."
Liam Gallagher
Kako dolgočasno bi bilo življenje brez modrosti bratov Gallagher.
35. "Youve seen one of our gigs, youve seen em all."
Liam Gallagher
34. "Drugs is like getting up and having a cup of tea in the morning."
Noel Gallagher
33. "[Liam is] like a man with a fork in a world of soup."
Noel Gallagher
32. "If there were gold medals for taking drugs for England I would have won a shit load"
Noel Gallagher
31. "Youre not fuckin telling me that somebody thats into The fuckin Wombats is feeling the same thing as I was when I was into the Pistols? Im not fuckin having that."
Noel Gallagher
30. "Were inherently lazy working class Mancunians, you know what I mean? We wanna be getting pissed half the time, and the other fuckin time we wanna be getting fuckin high."
Noel Gallagher
29. "I do all the work so its only right that I should get the most money. Plus I am the most handsome."
Noel Gallagher
28. "I hate that Alex [James] and Damon [Albarn]. I hope they catch AIDS and die."
Noel Gallagher
27. "Rock and roll doesnt allow you to grow up - especially if youre not trying very hard to."
Scott Weiland
26. "I like to think of us as Clearasil on the face of the nation. Jim Morrison would have said that if he was smart, but hes dead."
Lou Reed
25. "Never talk about a man until youve walked a mile in his shoes. That way when you talk about him youre a mile away and you have his shoes."
Nathan Followill, Kings of Leon
24. "There wouldnt be no grime without me."
Dizzee Rascal
23. "I wont be happy until Im as famous as God."
Madonna
22. "Somebody said to me, ‘But The Beatles were antimaterialistic. Thats a huge myth. John and I literally used to sit down and say, ‘Now, lets write a swimming pool.
Paul McCartney
21. "Of course were doing it for the money. Weve always done it for the money."
Mick Jagger
Mick Jagger je včasih študiral ekonomijo. Res.
20. "I gave up rock ‘n roll for the rock of ages! I used to be a glaring homosexual until God changed me!"
Little Richard
19. "Yes, if there is such a thing as [genius], I am one."
John Lennon
18. "Ive got a fierce passion for politics but I cant stand the smarmy, hypocritical upper-middle-class dictator nation that prevails and has always prevailed in this country. Im up for petrol bombers, mate, and fighting in the streets."
Pete Doherty
17. "Sometimes when Im flying over the Alps I think, ‘Thats like all the cocaine I sniffed."
Elton John
16. "Dont do drugs, dont have unprotected sex, dont be violent... leave that to me."
Eminem
15. "Well, put it this way, compared to the Razorlight album [Bob] Dylan is making the chips. Im drinking champagne."
Johnny Borrell
14. "I think if it doesnt do what I say, if it doesnt do what I want, if it isnt politically subversive, if it isnt sexy, if it isnt stylish to make all that happen then it isnt truthfully worth listening to."
Malcolm McLaren
13. "Id love to think that Ive maybe influenced people to consider a vegetarian lifestyle, but in my heart of hearts I fear that more than that Ive encouraged them to get wasted and fucked up."
Chrissie Hynde
12. "Good music should always come from the groin. Never the brain. Good music is about fucking."
Mani
11. "Drugs goofed my mind up."
Brian Wilson
10. "To be in Kings Of Leon you need at least two STDs, a drinking problem, and a love of animals."
Nathan Followill
9. "Im really happy Im me because if I wasnt Id be scared. If you want that Number One spot you need to listen to my album and try to beat it."
Kanye West
8. "Its actually come as quite a shock to learn just how many people dont like me."
Phil Collins
7. m warning you with peace and love I have too much to do. So no more fan mail. Thank you, thank you. And no objects to be signed, nothing. Peace and love, peace and love."
Ringo Starr
6. "I want to be like Gandhi and Martin Luther King and John Lennon - but I want to stay alive."
Madonna
Madonna: neuničjiva!
5. "What about whales? They are ignoring animals that are more important. Animals need saving and thats more important. This New York thing is being blown out of proportion. Who gives a fuck about New York when elephants are being killed."
Lee Ryan
4. "Were more popular than Jesus now; I dont know which will go first - rock ‘n roll or Christianity."
John Lennon
3. "When you think about it, Adolf Hitler was the first pop star."
David Bowie
2. "Vote for Enoch Powell... I think Enochs right, I think we should send them all back. Stop Britain from becoming a black colony. Get the foreigners out. Get the wogs out. Get the coons out. Keep Britain white."
Eric Clapton
Sergio Pizzorno: skromen kot vedno in nenamerno duhovit.
1. "Dance music was on its arse before we came along."
Serge Pizzorno (Kasabian)
